All the beautiful things we did this summer.
I was ready to move on to fall. But then I realized I could not give up on summer that easily.
I admit, this summer has not been my favorite. I recently heard myself say, “I feel like all I did this summer was get through a breakup and move.” And it’s kind of true. These two monumental tasks have taken up an inordinate amount of my mental and emotional energy, which hasn’t left much for things like swimming and camping and happily eating watermelon.
I bought an “Autumn Leaves” candle a week ago and promptly lit it. The nights have gotten cooler and that was all I needed to force fall to come. Was it September 1st yet? No. Did I care? No. Summer has kind of sucked. I’m ready for it to be over.
Recently someone downloaded the autumn manifesto printable from my shop (they’re always available, and free!) and it got me thinking that maybe I just needed to move on from summer. I did half-heartedly fill out a summer manifesto back in June, some of which I got to and most of which I didn’t. I was ready to toss it in the trash and print a fall one, eager to go apple picking and buy pumpkins and convince myself that I no longer needed to bother with summer and all the complex changes it brought.
But then, I thought about this season.
I thought about the plump red tomatoes I bought at a farmers market one rainy Sunday with Alison. I thought about the music festival I went to by myself in the late-June heat. I thought about watching Brooks put his tiny pudgy toes in the cold Connecticut ocean for the first time. I thought about how I sat in the dark in an echo-ey nearly-moved-out-of apartment one July night and read “In Blackwater Woods” out loud to no one in particular, a way to honor my leaving. I thought about making s’mores over my stove with homemade gluten free graham crackers and heaping bouquets of freshly-picked hydrangeas from dear friends’ gardens and rain storms so heavy I was soaked before I even got to the car.
No, I could not give up on summer that easily.
I thought that maybe instead of making a list of all the things I want to do in the next season, I should first honor all the things I did this season. I might not be able to cross everything off my summer manifesto I made with great hope a few months ago (camping was a lofty goal), but there’s so much I did that I didn’t even plan for. Those things deserve some space, too.
And so I give you a “What I Did This Summer” list. A bit of a departure from the seasonal manifestos I’ve been putting out for almost ten years now. (!) A way to look back and take stock before moving forward.
Maybe you only muddled through the summer, too. Maybe there were no big trips or picturesque views or idyllic weekends. Maybe you just got through it.
But maybe you tasted a perfect watermelon, or watched the sun set, or listened to a baby laugh, or ate dinner outside.
Maybe we can’t give up on summer so easily.
(And if you’re also ready to plan for fall, which is factually the best season of the year, get your autumn manifesto here!)